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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26405284">"This isn't prison break."</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nataco/pseuds/Nataco'>Nataco</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Euphoria (TV 2019)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Clubbing, Escape, F/F, Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Inpatient, Recreational Drug Use</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 11:35:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,373</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26405284</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nataco/pseuds/Nataco</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Rue runs away for a night from rehab with a bunch of people she doesn't know. Yes she gets en trouble but yes she has a lot of fun even though shes reminded of what shes missing out on while being in an inpatient facility.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rue - Relationship, Rue Bennett &amp; Jules Vaughn, Rue Bennett/Jules Vaughn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>35</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>4 parts .</p>
    </blockquote><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“You learned to run from what you feel, and that's why you have nightmares. To deny is to invite madness. To accept is to control.”<br/>― Megan Chance, The Spiritualist</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Rue laughs absently at the other group of "degenerates" as Ali would call them. They are walking along the side of the road towards wherever a kid named Malcolm was leading them. She technically was supposed to be in her small dorm bed asleep and awaiting 4 am check in. But instead here she was being a fellow degenerate who had technically escaped the rehab facility. They all intended on going back to the treatment facility eventually. She hopes Sol would even though it meant they probably would be separated. They all just needed a night of more because everyone was on edge and needed a break. Everyone was aware that the consequences would be getting kicked out or all restrictions taken away. But, fuck it.</p><p> </p><p>Her group of acquaintances, because they were not her friends, was made up of a random assortment of folks. One of which was some guy named Graham who was apparently the older "brother" of Angel. Angel was the only one out of the group besides her roommate who actually knew more than whatever she half-assed in group therapy. Which was very little but it was enough to keep them.... interested. Rue shoves her hands in the pockets of a pair of baggy shorts that Angel threw at her in a parking lot after everyone met back up. Their escape plan was a plan but they all booked it through a hole in the fence and through a patch of woods at first. Some person named Bones, who had to at least be a sophomore in college, picked them all up in a hatchback and the Graham who opened a backpack filled with vices.</p><p> </p><p>Rue steered clear of the opiates and went straight for the bottle of Coconut Rum. Even though she could practically hear the pills singing her fucking name. Most of them actually opted to be clean of whatever landed them in rehab but not sober. Not everyone though because Angel was definitely rolling a tiny bit and so were two other people out of the 5 fence jumpers. Including her roommate Sol. Rue just figured the slap on the wrist once they got back would be less harsh without a positive test. The rum was more than enough to stay kind of alert amongst everyone here. All these faces that might leave her dying face down in a ditch if she OD'ed....again.</p><p> </p><p>She wasn't even in here because of an overdose. Just a basic relapse that made her mom's mind up for her and now she was forced into a stupid facility with strangers. They forced her to talk, made sure she ate, but she honestly felt worse being inside than out. It was probably working the 12 steps and quiet therapy sessions but in places she didn't see yet. This right here though the warmth of the air touching her skin as the packed car they'd all tumbled into hurtled through empty streets. Leaning her head back she mumbles along the lyrics while Sol pulls at the worn shirt collar. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>    "Beep beep go swerving in my, Beep been you want me riding in your...."</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Rue sighs feeling sticky lips press against her clavicle and up her neck.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>   "Beep beep ghost busting in my.... Beep beep you want me riding in your....driving super fast."</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sol was cool people but Rue knew it couldn't be anything more than fooling around. Kissing when no one was watching or either of them came back from a therapy session sobbing.  Sometimes Sol sneaking into her bed at night so they could have quickie sex sessions. This wasn't how Rue expected to explore her sexuality that was pretty dormant but it was what she had. It also wasn't with who she had in mind either. Lingering feelings aside the two of them were stuck in a juvenile inpatient program. With the same beds as the ones in college pamphlets, a no shoelace rule, and  fuzzy socks ( that Rue secretly loves). This girl was like 3 inches shorter than Rue, dark skinned, neck tattoos and a short cut. Sol had been through so much more shit than Rue and it made her feel ungrateful. Ungrateful because at least she had a hard working mom who still loved her and hadn't abandoned all hope. Other people in the program who took it seriously though told her not to because her life sucked too.</p><p> </p><p>Feeling Sol's lips on hers she kissed her back. She didn't feel anything but it must have felt amazing to Sol who deepened the kiss. The car swerved past what in Rue's mind had to be a pothole. Sol falls away further into her body clutching the fabric of her shirt and accidentally her chest. Rue hears Sol sigh and snaps her eyes open while Sol still kisses her. Rue grabs hold of the handle above the door and sits back up mumbling, what was that. She watches Sol roll her eyes and sit back into the tan seats.</p><p> </p><p>"Oh FUCK," Bones yelled slowing the car down and pulling over. Bones had their black hair slicked all the way back and a cigarette falling out of their mouth. They were odd enough sober and everyone's dd, just a ball of chaotic a.d.d they'd laughed at her earlier as they walked her from the gas station bathroom back to the car. It was a nice gesture because apparently she seemed "kind of uncomfortable," which was true. The urge to escape herself dulled the fear of her mother's true unbridled anger. Or Fez's.</p><p> </p><p>He was really upset when he found out she got a new plug after actually being clean for so long. She turns to look out the back window and sees two green eyes attached to a small grey mound in the road. </p><p> </p><p>"What the....OMG a cat OMG," Angel is practically bouncing out of the car after pulling out a half eaten filet o fish. Rue watches him in an outfit she felt fit him so much more than the basic t-shirt and sweatpants he wore everyday. His platform sneakers lit up across the black asphalt as he inches  closer to the obviously terrified animal. A glitter covered arm wove in front of him with food and Rue leans into the window in anticipation. The only thing that could make Angel seem even more angelic was wings or a halo above his half platinum half silver hair. He honestly seemed like the type to fit right into Jules's friend group. But instead he was the kind creative rave kid who drew her pictures of kandi bracelets he'd give her one day. </p><p> </p><p>"Hey um...you ," she feels her shoulder being tapped. "Put this in your lap."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>song's super fast by king khan on soundcloud</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Following all the rules leaves a completed checklist. Following your heart achieves a completed you.”<br/>― Ray A. Davis<br/>Or just adopt a stray cat.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>no beta srry so sleepy</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Yes! I love this song," Bones yells back rolling down the windows. The cool autumn air filling the car and the smell of weed being blown out the window. Rue shakes her head hearing Angel and Bone's belt out lyrics from the driver and passenger seat. </p>
<p>
  <em>"I feel your hands on my body</em><br/>
<em>Every time you think of me"</em>
</p>
<p>Her heel is bouncing with a mix of anxiety and anticipation. With one more she could become triple A instead of alcoholics anonymous. She can feel a comfortable softness against her sole. It's from a piece of fabric she keeps stuffed in her sock. Her knee keeps bouncing in place with the sleeping kitten being stroked by Sol in her lap. Her current reality is so much more serene than the one she relives in her head.</p>
<p>
  <em>"Hey QT, yeah?</em><br/>
<em>Even though you're so far away</em><br/>
<em>I feel your hands on my body"</em>
</p>
<p>Arrival nurses took her hoodie at this new place only letting it stay with her the first night. She was so fucking high on check in that she screamed please don't take my dad please as they explained it to her mom. Her mom who she clung to like they were about to skin her alive. Chest rising and falling quick enough someone said something about a shot. Too high to be cold and distant but not enough for her heart to stop. Just enough to be a paranoid fuck up. Leslie tried to calm her down but it only worked after her mom bargained with them, one night.</p>
<p>One night and then her mom visited the next day to say goodbye. Slipping a gray square in her pocket. It was worn in from a t-shirt that her dad wore in her baby pictures. Leslie hugged her so tight before leaving whispering we love you so much. That was the last time she'd seen her mom and every time she called Leslie said oh rue like her heart was breaking again. So those phone calls were short because her mom crying always fucks her up mentally for a few days. The silent pauses remind her of the little sister who always has faith in her but is turning into someone who doesn't even look at her. </p>
<p>"You okay," Sol whispers and rue nods because when was she ever. Her arm that sol is resting on is cramping but she lets it, not much arm space in this back row anyway. She should have just chosen the trunk with some 16 year old named Zach. </p>
<p>"On the left! Yesss we made it and on time too," Graham jeers next to Sol.</p>
<p>Rue looks at the dash clock crinkling her brow. "How is almost 1 am on time," she whispers. </p>
<p>Sol chuckles, "It is a club not a house party you knew that right ?"</p>
<p>Rue bites the inside of her lip and shakes her head no. Sol puckers a bottom lip and kisses her cheek. Great pity Rue thinks.</p>
<p>Sol leans in to whisper to Rue, "Don't worry Graham knows the bouncer. No fakes required."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rue opens back up the glass bottle in the seat net and lets the clear liquid burn her throat a bit. Out of her realm was an understatement, house parties were something she was used to but never clubs. She didn't even know what kind of club this was but judging from the giant rainbow flag out front, angry repressed frat bros wouldn't be an issue. Which helped the nerves in her stomach unwind. The fur ball on her lap made a noise and she rubbed it through the sweater it's been laid on. Sol said the kitten was probably dumped because there was a tag scar and the kitten was super clean. But was she risking it....no.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Sol takes the bottle from her hand and screws the cap back on. "You gonna dance with me tonight Benny." Sol says as she nudges her shoulder.</p>
<p>
  <em>"Every time you think of me, boy</em><br/>
<em>Every time you think of me, boy."</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>"Maybe," Rue shrugs. The silence and awkwardness she tries not to show still shows and she wishes she could hide those tells better when clean. At least when on something people just took her quirks for her being unstable, not her being nervous or scared.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>" Okay well how about anyone else," Sol grins coyly.</p>
<p>
  <em>"Every time you think of me</em><br/>
<em>Hey QT, yeah?</em><br/>
<em>Even though you're so far away."</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rue looks away from her and out the window. She's more interested in the brick building as they get closer than someone's hot sweaty body. There's a line to the door with several guards standing with gloved hands and flashlights. "I don't know maybe," Rue looks back at Sol who is rolling her eyes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>" Yes she is," Angel yells from the passenger seat. He's checking his makeup in the mirror and winks at rue. Which makes her tuck her hair behind her ear and cough to cover the blush. Angel turns around happily and says, "meee!"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Leaning forward Sol pecks Angel on the lips and says, " Bennett your goal tonight is to have fun, dance with someone. He, she, they, who cares, maybe you'll get a lil prison pen pal."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rue rolls her eyes, that probably wasn't happening but it was about trying new experiences. Treatment was also not prison; it just was not freedom either. Bones pulls past the entrance and swings into the parking lot. Graham is behind them pointing as they follow directions. He's even saying fun facts like this is Knott's which Angel keeps mimicking. Bones slowly moves the car  until  one guard leans his hand in the window. The guard daps Graham up and they laugh for a second. His name's apparently DJ and he's their in. The only rules are no weapons. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>In the parking lot they all get put and Rue notices other cars with clusters of people around them. She shakes her lap free of cigarette ash and cat hair. The cat now named sparkle is being in the trunk with a makeshift bed, a small can of tuna Bones just had and an old bottle lid filled with water. Rue leans down and ties the mismatched dollar store laces on her chucks. They had hot dogs on them which was kind of cute. A tire squeals close by of a car obviously moving way too fast and drunk singing out a window speeds past them. Idiots. Everyone else was finishing a shared bottle or blunt. Leaning against the side of the trunk she feels Sol rest against her arm warming it up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rue can hear a steady thump and beat coming from the brick building. It makes her head move which means the music might not be her thing but it'll be tolerable. Graham even said there's another section with actual seats that has a more contained dance floor with pop and hip-hop. Just in case she got overwhelmed by the rave scene and the lights. She doubles over as she laughs at Angel's jokes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Kid was fucking hilarious, she stands up wiping her eyes oh happy tears and freezes looking in front of her. Her body runs cold and her breathe slips from her. No.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hey QT by QT</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Three</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>I'll edit this summary and notes later, my friend told me to just post it.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>"TC!," Angel gasps and rushes to a person who whips around at his voice. Rue is still frozen feeling her throat dry up quickly. TC's friend group starts to turn and Rue can hear Angel rambling. She hears his excitement go over the details of escape, party favors, and a cat. Rue feels relief setting in hoping her eyes are deceiving her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>TC is getting closer and so is Angel but so is Angel listing off everyone's name in their escapee group. Her stomach absolutely churns with fries and rum when Angel starts to speak even louder. " Rue is like super fucking pretty and tall and shy ugh love her."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue's eyes follow Angel to TC and then watch TC turn in slow motion. It was tripping her out how everything felt like a movie but this time she was not high on anything.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Hey Jules don't you know a Rue..." TC says. TC's voice sounds like her ears are floating in the Matrix and her insides spin. She can feel Sol press into her ear and whisper, "Why's the blonde....oh you really shit out of luck." Rue's stomach flip flops and she feels her Mcdouble with cheese rumbling but knows it will stay down.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As time goes back to normal, Rue watches Sol step away quickly like she's a roach and stern blue eyes are spraying her with raid bug spray. Sol quickly shakes her hands while mouthing oops. Rue balls her hand into a small fist of comfort and meets her bestfriends glare. It's nothing she can read but at least Jules is super pretty. She's in a dress that looks like a bunch of pieces of fabric sewed together real crazily. It has tiny straps and shows off a large amount of cleavage. The fabric bunches at her waist and cuts off at her thigh. Rue feels the drool forming in her mouth when she lands on Jules's feet. White heels that are moving across the grayish black ground beneath them and toward her. They stop in front of the white toe box of her chucks. Matching her brain finally speaks and her personal space is flooded with Jules all over her again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Listen it's not....," Rue starts to say lifting her gaze. Her throat is wrapped by two arms instead and she leans into Jules's neck forcibly. She slowly wraps her arms around Jules and tells her brain not to go full feral gay idiot. Her hands are moist and her legs feel like fucking warm jello.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You didn't say goodbye," Jules's voice shakes and Rue can hear it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She doesn't even feel like unpacking how impossible that would have been  for so many reasons. Including not knowing when the heck Jules was staying home on the weekends or not. As well as, Jules being emotionally so out of touch recently they were miles apart. So instead she whispers almost kissing Jules's ear, "Sorry."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Awe," a voice she doesn't immediately recognize coos to their embrace. Ahh one of Jules's little girlfriends that's always facetiming the blonde when they are supposed to be hanging out. Well before Rue got figured out by her mom....again and sent away. Fuck of course Jules wouldn't be single anymore. Rue starts to pull away but feels Jules tighten around her. Well this was....oddly normal and far less terrifying. Jules lets go eventually and the two groups make their way over to the entrance. Jules held her hand but seemed to gel back into the group in seconds. The bolted metal door opens up and Rue's eyes go wide. Oh fuck.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The lights sway multi-colored and a wall of colors change. A woosh of cool air hits her from above and the air surprisingly doesn't smell terrible. She thinks that detail is going to change later, which it does but she is too busy actually enjoying herself to care. Loud music greats her as the heavy door clanks behind her back, making her jump. A hand steadies her and she turns to see who it is. Neon glowing eyelids are soft as they meet her and Rue relaxes. She isn't surrounded by strangers, Jules is here, she isn't alone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue stumbles alongside the group and holds a breath for whatever is about to come.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>*******</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Aren't you like "not single"," Rue asks' rubbing her hands together. The outside air has gotten much chillier over the past hour. She had no idea because for the past almost 2 hours she's been in the hot crowded dance floor or the bar area. Rue had actually been having a lot of fun, even though her dancing was awkward Angel kept his watchful eye on her. Well when he wasn't grinding into everyone else. Jules stumbled over to the bar in between really erratic pop noises, to check in with her. Her friend took residency of her lap before yelling come with me and dragging her towards the exit signs. Her drink of mainly pineapple juice but a good amount of vodka spilled a bit in her hand leaving it sticky. What didn't make its way into her palm was swallowed quickly before she was thrust into the cold air. The cold air that went from refreshing to spine rattling. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules laughs loudly, "No," the smoke she inhaled spurring out. She leans against the railings next to the door and crosses her legs that are covered in goosebumps. Rue runs a hand through her hair, cool cool she thinks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jules watches the way Rue adjusts her stance and stands a little taller. Her own cheeks pull a little bit but she inhales the cigarette in between her fingers. Bad habit, she knows, but it was hard to stop. At least she wasn't smoking packs a day she usually told her dad when the notes of Glossier couldn't hide the strong nicotine attached to her jackets. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The only thing that didn't smell of tobacco was a zip up black hoodie she had. It was in rough shape and it wasn't even hers really. Rue's actually, leftover by accident after one sleepover. Then Rue had to go away again and she never got the chance to give it back. It just stayed folded up in one of her drawers or zipped around her while she laid under her comforter. Just because.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue clasps her palms now gumming together, her throat gagged a bit. "So it's okay if..." Rue starts to say but let's Jules piece together the rest because she had to know.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules raises her brow and passes the cigarette to Rue, "It is always okay with you Rue Rue." She watches Rue choke on her inhale and cough into her shoulder. Jules lets out a choked laugh and waits for Rue to recover, "but aren't you not single."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue feels her face move to a look of confusion, she can't hide it. Pulling the cigarette back to her lips she scratches her neck with her free hand. The sticky residue left on the brown filter is more appreciated than the feeling on her hands. Jules lips were just here, the tips still warm,, and Rue has to work hard not to take too long and burns into ashes at her feet. She watches Jules mouth out, s.o.l. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Ohhhh," Rue nods in understanding," i don't mean like yea we are a thing, because we aren't, not really." Rue looks away and then back, " we aren't a thing but she's there."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules taps her heels together and nods sadly, "And I'm not."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue flicks the cigarette and mumbles, " Yea." It's quiet then until Rue watches Jules shiver a bit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I need to go to the bathroom and you look like you need to wash your hand," Jules says as she starts to walk back up the small concrete stairs. Rue puts the butt out on the asphalt and follows her best friend wordlessly. She had nothing to add after that, she just wanted to rid her skin of the sticky sweet substance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>********</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue tipsily stumbles forward her arms waving at the emptiness in front of her. Of course the fucking light would go out on them while they were in the bathroom. The floor is swaying a bit but it's not so bad she feels sick, she just knows that she is no longer 101% sober. She has enough sense to tell herself she's not drinking anymore, minus water, and she feels certain she won't. Alcohol wasn't her preferred vice at all.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Jules where the fuck did you go," Rue laughs nervously to herself. What if Jules had dipped at her bold sadness that she carried over her shoulder constantly. There was no door swinging open though and as her adjusted Rue blinks a few times. Slowly the shape of the blonde standing next to her comes to and she can see Jules leaning against the stall wall. The neon glow in the dark liner around her eyes glowing faintly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I like this song," Jules says as she hums next to her. The audio from past the doors is muffled and bass heavy, a soft voice mixes with a more electronic song she's never heard before. A deep thud vibrates into the bathroom and the tempo slows down until her head is bobbing with a familiar sound.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Mmmm Sza," Rue hears herself slur out in response. Fuck she couldn't be that drunk, it was only....fuck yea she was tettering the line between tipsy and drunk. Her body steadily bops along the cold metal as her hand mimics soft waves in front of her face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue can feel the girl leaning further into her shoulder before her friend's forehead is pressing against her temple. Rue can smell the sugary sweet alcohol on her friend's breath and feels an arm snaking across her stomach. She glances to the girl whose mumbling lyrics so close they shared the same air as the same words she repeated. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You be heavy in my mind, can you get the heck out?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue pulls the back of her hand off the wall and rests it on Jules' side. She can hear Jules stumble over the next few words as they both recite them and swallows back the hope forming in her brain.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You so, you so, you, baby, baby, babe</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I been on my empty mind shit...</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules presses her lips to Rue's cheek and stays close to her ear and Rue feels her body screaming flight flight over and over. Her heart is thumping in her chest heavy and her ears rushing. The beat rests in her stomach instead of her chest and she can't help the gulp her throat makes. Jules is still humming along with unheard lyrics that Rue can't focus on. Still she whispers out,</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Got me a war in my mind</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Gotta let go of weight, can't keep what's holding me</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Choosing wise....</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules presses her body closer to Rue's and all she can think is keep fucking singing drunko.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"What will break up in front of me?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All the while, I'll await my armored fate with a smile," the words oddly harmonize out of her throat and she feels the heavy head on her shoulder cock to the left.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules doesn't move but she does whisper into Rue's jawline with eyes wide open, " I still wanna try, I still believe in good days...good days."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules giggles backing away before tipsily swaying forward. Rue starts laughing too and mumbles hmmm. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue catches Jules as her friend almost knocks their foreheads together. Jules steadies herself and smiles, "Rue Rue...I gotta question..."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue shrugs her shoulders telling the other girl to go for it, Jules's hands are still in hers. They are warm and soft while Rue weaves their fingers together. Careful not to hold on too tight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Do you have a crush on me still?" Jules leans her head to the side.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue swallows but nods her head slowly, they dated...were dating? It wasn't a crush anymore but everything was the same when Jules was like this. Jules exhales pressing her body back into Rue's arms and rests her chin on her friends shoulder. Coiled curls cover her face as she mumbles into Rue's neck, "Mmm good....you're like dead ass right ?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Fuck yea," Rue nods her eyes feel heavy as the low music continues to drift into the dark bathroom.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Tell me I'm not my fears</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>My limitations</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I'll disappear</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>If you let me.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A soft yellow glow starts to fill the bathroom and Rue closes her eyes. Back up lights.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules pulls back and yawns, "Ooo mood lighting Rue." Rue rolls her eyes behind her lids. Well that was quick she thinks, one minute Jules is in her ear making her feel she is levitating and the next the girl is ripping her out of that alternate reality. Although when she opens her eyes Jules is still really close. Rue hears the bass outside changing to something and licks her lips that are currently drying the fuck out. She can not only hear a shudder next to her but she sees it ripple across Jules' chest. Which she quickly diverts her eyes away from before her brain starts saying different forms of boobies over and over.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The bathroom door squeaks open and the speakers start to blast out, "Rollin', rollin', rollin', got me stargazin." Bass is bumping so loud that Rue feels her face go wide before the door squeaks shut. Jules snickers out loud and smiles.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"What ?" Rue lowers her already alcohol lidded eyes. She watches Jules lick her lips and doesn't wait for the answer. She had enough alcohol to not need one, Jules wanted her to kiss her, always wanted her to kiss her. She was just too afraid to try....most times, the confidence got to her after some thinking. This time though she pulled Jules's face to hers and kissed her until the blonde tugs at her lips lightly. The kiss doesn't stop she just lets Jules direct their scene for a few moments until she gets restless.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Jules! Are you in here? Rue!," Angel's voice echoes into the bathroom but Jules pulls Rue closer. A shared but silent we don't need to stop between both of them. Rue can hear the door open and close again as someone starts knocking on stall doors. Jules wraps her arms around Rue's neck and Rue wraps her around Jules's waist. A gasp comes from one of them when someone knocks on their door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A small voice that is definitely attached to Sol whispers, "Y'all in there? We just wanna make sure you aren't kidnapped." The squeak of the door opens again and there is a loud chatter of a group filing into the bathroom. Jules pulls back and rolls her eyes shaking her head. Of course they all had to come see if the two group stragglerz had been found. They weren't quiet about it either Graham is slurring out, "O m g is Rue with her pretty blonde girlfriend. They are so cute."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yoo they are like the perfect fucked up ship wait wait they are Rules!," Zach slurs out in solidarity loudly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Angel starts laughing, "Rue and Jules, Rules wowww." </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue can see through the door slit that Sol is shaking her head. Jules looks at her bestfriend's exposed pulse point and attaches her teeth lightly. Rue could get into a little biting one of these days maybe, she thinks. The breathy moan that Rue can't cover fast enough is enough leeway for Jules to keep sucking there. They both her feet clomping quickly to their door and a phone flash light almost blinds Rue as she looks away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Hiiii Rueeee," Angel snickers and Rue feels mortified but the way that Jules has her pinned she can't exactly move away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In a quick exhale Rue tries to shakily say, "Hi guys." She can hear Sol saying sorry you guys, love you, as she ushers their entire friend group out the door. A camera goes off and Rue's eyes go wide but TC yells out, " THAT'S SO JULES CAN FINALLY CHANGE HER GAY ASS LOCKSCREEN."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules stops kissing Rue's neck and whispers, "Can they please shut up." Rue whispers awww and leans forward into Jules, their friends weren't leaving any time soon so they had time to get as many kisses in as they wanted. Because Rue couldn't go home back to Jules, back to a bed where bases might be skipped to or past, she couldn't hold her best friend with an open window until the sun came up, but she could kiss the blonde until they were both dizzy. Well, unless Bones didn't mind letting them sit in the trunk....hmm.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>songs I can remember used at 3am: sza- good days but the reverb version by Justin hill. While I wrote this I listened to that and "Hit different by sza but its slowed and you're making out at a party in the bathroom" on YouTube. Additional inspiration from a tiktok by grayallday.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. see you soon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I hope everyone enjoys the first part of the bridge episodes. I will be watching when it drops and I hope you all enjoy the last part of this story.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Jules puckers her lips touching Rue's tongue as her thumb hits the camera button. It's a cheap disposable TC left in her bag. When the picture is taken she smiles at Rue. She'd missed her so much, her best friend, her kind of girlfriend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yea she could visit and had once but it wasn't somewhere they could be relaxed. Laugh their asses off about memes and joke with a little morbidity. No, not inside the social area where everyone could watch them. Not that she wanted what they had to be a secret she just knew Rue probably mentions her in therapy. For good and bad reasons.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue nudges Jules's nose and her thoughts fade a little. Rue's nose is cold just like the hands resting on her thighs that sit over Rue's lap. Jules nuzzles back before kissing Rue lightly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules whispers in between kisses, "Can i like post pics from tonight... or ?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Do you have people from school on there?" Rue sighs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"My insta yes, my finsta not really." Jules widens her eyes a little and leans back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue leans against the back of the upright seat, " I don't know Jules, I wouldn't want someone to see, I'm not supposed to be out, then they tell Gia and then she gets scared and tells my mom and then...."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules rubs her friend's cheek hoping to stop the worry. "Rue it's okay you're right. I don't have to, maybe once you're out though."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yea for sure....1 month left." Rue chews her cheek to stop from smiling as she lets her cheeks be brushed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"They won't make you stay longer for this?" Jules says putting the camera down and uses both hands to hold Rue's face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue shakes her head and laughs, "No I'd probably get kicked out and be back home sooner. That just means my mom would probably track my every fucking move and put steel bars on my window. Fez too."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"At least your still clean....", Jules stills her thumbs,"...right?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue nods, "Yea just alcohol tonight."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules kisses Rue's forehead and rests her chin on her shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Okay." Rue says pulling on the fabric of Jules's dress skirt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Okay what?" Jules adjusts from her chin to her cheek on Rue's shoulder. She feels Rue brushing their fingers together.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You can post one to like your "finsta", Rue air quotes, "story but don't tag me. Also maybe be a little vague.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I can do vague....," Jules whispers and tucks her chin down. She looks at her lap and then starts to move. Rue's hands chase the contact of their fingers and Jules's body heat. Rue wasn't ready to go and she did not want to go back into that club.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"It's okay we aren't going back, just come here," Jules says behind her. She lays back in the trunk and motions for Rue to join her. Rue rolls her eyes but awkwardly crawls forward, what did this girl have in mind.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>*****</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rue watches Jules Instagram story one more time as the smell of breakfast surrounds her. Both her vagabond of escapees and Jules's group of friends are stuffed into the biggest seating area in the small diner. Rue has been there before 2 months ago when she found out her mom was admitting her to inpatient therapy. Woo hoo, a shit memory. Ali took her here for pancakes and said something about a program close by. The same program she practically was dragged to. Probably not a coincidence now that she thinks of it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She smiles at the p.o.v short video of her slowly belly flopping on Jules, laughter from them both buzzing in her ears. A single photo after is of her jawline and Jules' finger tips, shimmery glossy lip prints are obvious on her cheek and small bright red marks on her jaw. Jules really did learn to be a little discreet because it just looked like rue had rubbed her face too hard. Also her hair was rarely up since hair ties were "dangerous" for her roommate. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For a second rue wondered who her friend learned that from or with but it didn't really matter. They could save that for a night with more time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Words over the image were scattered like a poem but they read out, "wanting  all the kisses we didn't have that night. all the kisses we haven't had." In tiny letters there were more words, "I just really fucking miss my rue 😭." </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue smiles cause Jules was in reality right next to her with a fork full of pancakes. Rue took the headphone out of her ear and slid it back to Jules. The rest of the story was just Jules with her friends on the dance floor. Jules let her use her phone to check up on everyone at least visually via images. Gia looked pretty okay, the kid could fake a smile extremely well.  Lexi was “booed up for fall with coffee and books”. That was Lexi's actual caption not Rue's chosen words. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue didn't really care about sussing anyone else's profile. Her own still stagnant from her last selfie hunched over the front camera. Over 2 months ago with bags heavy around her eyes, her curls less curls and more dry waves. She looks back at the photo and cringes a little bit because wtf. At least the caption was fitting, " I feel like shit." Which was true then but right now she feels okay and that's pretty good.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue cradles Jules’ face, the sky is still black but it could break into sunrise blue at any moment. She's brushing away tears and telling Jules “it's okay”. Everyone is either changing in the car or smoking a cigarette. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Don't worry ill be fine. Rue coos using her sweater sleeve to wipe Jules's reddened face. The night's worn t-shirt hanging over her own shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules hiccups out tears, "I'm gonna really miss you Rue."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I love you, it's just one month." Rue shrugs. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules leans in and kisses her best friend. When she pulls back she whispers, "I love you too." </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jules waves one more time to the curly haired girl after a long hug. A hug where they clasped around each other hoping the nightmare would end soon. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She holds the t-shirt in her hands watching the car pull out of the lot. The group was headed back closer to the hole in the fence they broke through. Jules hopes they won't get caught as she climbs into TC's back seat. The shirt gets tucked into her bag and Jules spends the car ride back to the apartment thinking of Rue,  their backseat make out, and the way she'd forgotten how good it felt to have Rue around.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Rue lays in her dorm style bed with the covers over her head. She really should get some sleep after hauling ass back inside and successfully not getting caught. Another quiet, "power surge." The guard was really paid off well by Angel, she didn't want to speculate how and Angel was not around to answer any questions. He followed her on Instagram before they parted ways, told her to hit him up once she was out. She would. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For now she is rubbing her lips together sweet with pancake syrup and her kind of girlfriend's lip gloss. Tonight was worth the anxiety. Tonight was a good night and it was not a prison break just a break from reality.</span>
</p>
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